Sign In

Please sign in using the log in form at the top of this page or click here

Not a member

You need to register before you can start a new discussion or comment on a post.

Click the button below to go to our forum registration page.

In this Discussion

Welcome to the PDA Society Forum. Please take time to read the 'Forum terms and conditions', which can be found via this webpage: and also in our NEW Forum User Guide:
Messages in the 'General Discussions' category of the forum are visible to all internet users. You are therefore advised not to post anything of a confidential nature in this category.
Welcome to the PDA Society Discussion Forum. Please read our User Guide for more information and contact if you would like to join one of our closed Member Forums for registered members only.
Freedom of choice?
  • Amanda
    Posts: 281
    The law says that when our young people become adults they have the right to choose the services that they use and well most everything for themselves. Now in most circumstances this has to be a really great move, yes, because our young people have a disability they should still have the right to choose how they live their lives and with what help and I'm all for that! BUT.......for a young person with demand avoidance, like my son, this leaves me with a real problem as HIS choice would be to vegitate in his bedroom for the rest of his life among the mushrooms and the other fungi I haven't yet had the chance to identify :shock:
    When will the government realise one size doesn't fit all? I need Mark to move on to something similar to the post 16 placement he is at now, Ineed that for my sanity but also he needs it, he HAS to get out now and then, he HAS to leave the house, I HAVE to have a few hours with him not here, if you know what I mean.
    Give the choice to him though and it's those mushrooms and DVD's.

    Another side to this though has to be SS refusing services to us with PDA young people because the young person doesn't want them.
    Scary isn't it?!
  • webbwebb
    Posts: 2,593
    Hi Amanda

    I've sat here and read your post 3 or 4 times and then sat here and thought, alot!
    Our normal children probably do have a great freedom of choice and they grasp it with both hands and why not.
    However, like you say our disabled children don't have any choices at all, they have what the SS offers or nothing!

    For my Asperger son aged 16 we found a local college who have given him some additional support and we get a minimal amount of direct payments to fund a couple of hours a week befriending for him or he would become a recluse! However he desparately wants to leave home as he hates his younger brother and dosen't get on with his father; theres no way he could cope on his own, the SS would never help him live independantly and we couldn't give him enough money or time to help him cope.

    For our child who has PDA we were awarded Respite and Befriending 3 years ago. The befriending is barely working and the respite, well it was never the right placement, he had 5 over nights in 2 years and this has completely broken down.

    There is no freedom of choice for parents, children or our young disabled adults.

    I thought things were bad when my children were young and at school but I'm not liking the look of things now they are getting older.

    I suppose I have learnt to care for them better myself over the years but lets face it everyone needs a break now and again! Their self esteem and confidence will suffer if they don't find a forfilling role in life or a stimulating place to be cared for.

    I'm totally with you Amanda, our young people have very few options in life.

This discussion has been closed.
All Discussions