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Sons meltdown causes traffic jam inDublin
  • BernieHenryAug242016 Hi all What a dy it's been Pauls dad booked an appointment for him to have a massage in Dublin at 11o clock this morning We thought it would help with his anxiety and sensory issues .We set off in plenty of time this morning He was a little bit jittery but I ve seen him much worse We were going along okay we hit the centre city traffic On the back seat beside where Paul was sitting was a CD contained within its plastic case Paul bit into the CD cover and broke a piece of his front Tooth this triggered an almighty meltdown I was driving called me awful names Then went to attackhis dad in the seat Took chunks out of his hair tried to strangle him allthe while kicking the side window motorists at the side and behind stared in utter horror I kept driving all I could do in the situation We drove onto the quays running alongside the Liffey paul in the eye of the meltdown A fire brigade drives alongside us sees what's going on pulls in in front of us some how stops and puts on its blue lights Dublin is been dug up at the moment because new tram lines are been put in place So this caused a massive jam I never felt more exposed in all my life Firemen come over to the stopped car father manages to get out to tell them son is autistic and having a meltdown Son is now attacking me choking me and pulling my hair Firemen were very nice and tried to talk to him to no avail He gets my mobile and flings it at them Itell them they are upping his anxiety and I'd try to cal him I don't know how I did it but I did manage to get him calm after about ten minutes and much staring from very irate passing motorists The poor boy burst into tears and said he was a terrible person I said he was the best boy in the world and he had helped me so much by calming down dad gets back in the car minus chunks of hair plus loads of bite marks on his arms and neck The fire brigade drives off we drive into the traffic and he got to the appointment on time Don't think I'd survive another incident like that
  • OMG berniehenry...I'm so sorry. Having had my youngest attack both me and her dad whilst driving at various times I know how awful this can be and she wasn't on the scale of what your son did and is a lot smaller, the most immediately dangerous was a few months back when she opened the car door whilst having a meltdown and her bag (luckily not her!) dropped into the middle of the road, we had to drive back and get it (it's a miracle another car hadn't driven over it and destroyed the contents). It's a living hell when incidents like this occur. You must feel war-torn and bruised.

    I so wish there was something someone could do for you.

    What are your plans for the longer term with your son? If his aggression is frequent and you have no way of managing it, have you thought of whether there is some sort of supported living when he's at the stage you feel is old enough? You and his dad need to think of yourselves at some point.
  • Holly59
    Posts: 2,586
    Wow, how you coped was amazing. You remained so calm. It was so kind of the Fireman to try and support you. They will want to learn by today's experience as well.

    Do you think it was because he was going somewhere new, a different experience? How did the massage work? Could they come to you next time

    I know it's so difficult but try and think of the positive, he left the house and had something new a massage , and you coped amazingly brilliant with the situation.

    A VERY large glass of wine tonight I Think. Plan B or two , three..........xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Bernie Henry thanks for kind comments ladies he just doesn't seem to be able to cope with ANY demands at all at the moment and believe me we are trying our best not to put any onhimatthe moment I suppose going for the massage today was a demand and it upped his anxiety big time when he broke a piece of his tooth that just blew the anxiety onto a different level the therapist who was working with hi said he was very receptive he gave him special oil to rub on his feet Paulwas cal while he was working on him but when he transitioned onto the street with his dad he had another melt down so as usual he must have been masking I suppose the following few days will tell if the therapy helped himItwould be great if it did and we would bring him for a few more sessions. It's heartbreaking isn't it you try to help your child and in the process you up their anxiety.it just breaks you heart When you try so hard and NOTHING seems to give them relief from their suffering Well I've survived today so Pauls dad and I must be a pair of tough old boots
  • Holly59
    Posts: 2,586

    berniehenry said:

    Bernie Henry thanks for kind comments ladies he just doesn't seem to be able to cope with ANY demands at all at the moment and believe me we are trying our best not to put any onhimatthe moment I suppose going for the massage today was a demand and it upped his anxiety big time when he broke a piece of his tooth that just blew the anxiety onto a different level the therapist who was working with hi said he was very receptive he gave him special oil to rub on his feet Paulwas cal while he was working on him but when he transitioned onto the street with his dad he had another melt down so as usual he must have been masking I suppose the following few days will tell if the therapy helped himItwould be great if it did and we would bring him for a few more sessions. It's heartbreaking isn't it you try to help your child and in the process you up their anxiety.it just breaks you heart When you try so hard and NOTHING seems to give them relief from their suffering Well I've survived today so Pauls dad and I must be a pair of tough old boots



    Never mind the old!!!!!!
    Just a thought how about promoting the positive out of this. Write to the Fire Brigade and Thank them for their kindness. You might get an invite to the local fire station. Sure your son would enjoy it. You could even ask them to sign the PDA petition, never miss an opportunity.

    Sorry to hear about the tooth, just survived root canal surgery, it certainly was an experience. I now
    look at surgeries from the Autism Spectrum point of view, very scary. Massive sensory overload.
  • Good idea Holly59!
  • Holly59
    Posts: 2,586

    PlanetAutism said:

    Good idea Holly59!



    Thinking it would do Berniehenry some good, all those hunky firemen. (*) :-c ;)
  • mrscoco
    Posts: 190
    berniehenry sending big hugs your way - you are an incredible mum and I really dont know how you did that but you managed to calm your son and get to your appointment too. I cant imagine how you must have been feeling and just wanted you to know I am thinking about you xx
  • BernieHenry aug 25 Hi PA Holly and Mrs coco thanks for all your kind messages I so appreciate interacting with you all you are all my lifesavers Well can you believe after all we went through yesterday Pauls behaviour has escalated he seems even more anxious you just can't win . Yesterday he chipped a front tooth and caused the busiest thouraghfare in Dublin to Jam up .Today he broke my TV what the heck I'm used to it !! Pauls dad who is big into alternative therapies said he'd need to have a few sessions to see a benefit !! No school place lined up pass me that bottle of wine Thank you all from the bottom of my heart
  • Holly59
    Posts: 2,586

    berniehenry said:

    BernieHenry aug 25 Hi PA Holly and Mrs coco thanks for all your kind messages I so appreciate interacting with you all you are all my lifesavers Well can you believe after all we went through yesterday Pauls behaviour has escalated he seems even more anxious you just can't win . Yesterday he chipped a front tooth and caused the busiest thouraghfare in Dublin to Jam up .Today he broke my TV what the heck I'm used to it !! Pauls dad who is big into alternative therapies said he'd need to have a few sessions to see a benefit !! No school place lined up pass me that bottle of wine Thank you all from the bottom of my heart



    We all wish we could help,you more, feel so helpless but you always are so upbeat even though everything goes terribly wrong and your wonderful sense of humour shines through.. You are an amazing Mumt xxxxx
  • Is there somewhere nearer to you that does the therapies so you don't have long and stressful journeys for him berniehenry?

    Agree with Holly59, you are so fab and your son is lucky to have a mum like you, hold your head up and know that you are doing amazingly in extremely difficult circumstances and things will get better at some point. Wishing you a great night out for a craic sometime soon! \:D/
  • Bernie Henry Thank you all guess what Idont care anymore about about what anybody thinks. About me I'm doing my best and it is very difficult But you fellow posters have kept me going .Great big thanks and hugs to you all
  • Bernie Henry I've never done drugs but I'm looking at my bitten TV screen with its swirling colours nearest thing I ll ever get to an acid trip Thank you PDA
  • I'm trying to imagine bite marks in a TV screen and how that works!
  • Holly59
    Posts: 2,586
    [

    berniehenry said:

    Bernie Henry I've never done drugs but I'm looking at my bitten TV screen with its swirling colours nearest thing I ll ever get to an acid trip Thank you PDA



    http://www.toughfurniture.com/

    I just get the blurred effect with my dyslexia and Irlen syndrome. The swirling colours is a migraine after trying to cope!!

    Your posts always bring a smile to my face, it's the Irish sense of humour. It's wonderful xxxx
  • Bernie Henry bringing paul for another massage tomorrow Wed Aug31 Lets hope it goes a bit better than last week Will report back later Adios amigos
  • Holly59
    Posts: 2,586

    berniehenry said:

    Bernie Henry bringing paul for another massage tomorrow Wed Aug31 Lets hope it goes a bit better than last week Will report back later Adios amigos



    Think positive.Think positive. Think positive . I have everything crossed for you. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Bernie Henry thanks holly we just thought it had helped him a little bit sowe made a later appointment for tommorrow to avoid the hellish traffic Dublin is being dug up at the moment to bring in a tram system so traffic is manic all day But any little help that we can bring to Paul is grasped with open arms stay strong and thanks for your support will report back
  • Holly59
    Posts: 2,586

    berniehenry said:

    Bernie Henry thanks holly we just thought it had helped him a little bit sowe made a later appointment for tommorrow to avoid the hellish traffic Dublin is being dug up at the moment to bring in a tram system so traffic is manic all day But any little help that we can bring to Paul is grasped with open arms stay strong and thanks for

    https://www.facebook.com/AutismWorldAwareness/?hc_ref=ADS&fref=nf&ft[tn]=kC&ft[qid]=6324911842620715647&ft[mf_story_key]=-7474607541337393648&ft[ei]=AI@56b2c5eb8a7181194031b2c676ef1e81&ft[fbfeed_location]=1&ft[insertion_position]=27&__md__=1

    https://teespring.com/stores/autismworld xxxxx

    Saw these car stickers thought of you!!

  • ...they need to do one that says: "CAUTION - autistic child in meltdown aboard, please form a protective cortege!"

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