Here’s an email template which can be used to inform the people and professionals in your life about PDA and the approaches that help. We hope this will help everyone to be better understood and supported.
This information sheet can also be downloaded and attached to the email and we’ve included some links to our website where the recipient(s) can find out more about PDA - feel free to add any other links or attachments that would benefit your situation.
To use the template, please copy and paste the text below into an email. The template can then be personalised by editing or replacing the [bold text in square brackets] with your own details and experiences. You could send one email to multiple people or adapt and personalise the text for each person you send it to – whatever works best for you.
Dear [Name of the person/people you are writing to]
I’m writing to share some information with you about PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance) to help you to understand [me/my child/name of PDA person] and to give us the best chance of building a positive relationship and succeeding together.
PDA has a significant daily impact on [my/my child’s/name’s] life. [Tell them a little bit about this – does it make everyday things harder, limit what you can enjoy, how does it make you/them feel? Please write in your own voice here – the recipient(s) will be invested in you, and your personal experiences will help them to understand]
I’ve attached an information sheet about PDA to this email. I’d be grateful if you’d read it and share it with anyone you think might find it helpful.
Conventional approaches in support, parenting or teaching can heighten anxiety and cause harm to PDA people, for information on recommended approaches, please follow this link to the PDA Society website.
Some of the things that help [me/my child/name of PDA person] are [add some personal examples here of what helps e.g. being offered choices, doing things in your own time, indirect communication, quiet spaces etc.]
These approaches can make a real difference to [my/my child’s/name of PDA person’s] life. [Tell them a little bit about this – do they help you/them to cope with some demands, to feel less anxious, to do the things you/they enjoy, to feel safe?]
Thank you for being someone [I/we] trust enough to share [my/our/my child’s/name of PDA person’s] experience of PDA with.
The PDA Society also has lots of helpful information on their website. There’s specific information for family members and education, health and social care professionals, as well as training you can access. You can also sign up for emails here.